When Parker was born, Steve and I were convinced this parenting thing was much easier than many of our friends were letting on. Charlie had just turned two and, at that point, being a parent had been a breeze. He was peaceful and calm and we attributed this to our superior skills as parents, never suspecting that we simply had an easy baby. About the time we were feeling really smug…Parker burst on the scene.
Life has never been the same.
From very early on, life with Parker required being able to keep up. His zest was unmistakable. As a baby he had the capacity to make people stop taking life so seriously by smiling relentlessly until they reciprocated. He was charming and engaging even though he was always a little gooey. He drooled incessantly, which might have been an off-putting characteristic were he not so charming and engaging. Fortunately he got the drooling part under control a couple of years ago. But the charming and engaging part remains intact.
Creative and inventive and always envisioning the possibilities, Parker hasn’t ever been content with the status quo. As a toddler, no matter what he was wearing or what the occasion, he insisted on bucking social convention by wearing unmatched socks. His favorite color was pink. His favorite movie, Cinderella. And he loved to play dress up. At home he wasn’t ever taught nonsense about attaching gender to color or toys or preferred activities so when others would suggest these things didn’t align with him being a boy, he would look at them and then and simply wave his magic wand. He really couldn’t be bothered by their boundaries.
When Parker learned to roller-blade, just skating around the neighborhood wasn’t enough. As a family we had been biking around a nearby reservoir but Parker set his sights on skating the eight-mile radius instead. We cheered him on as he accomplished his goal. Likewise, as a pre-teen, Parker wanted to learn to ride a unicycle. But just learning to ride it wasn’t enough. Parker wanted to ride the unicycle around the reservoir. And we cheered him on as he accomplished that goal. Parker has always set goals for himself. And we've always cheered him on! Sometimes his friends laugh at him because his goals are rarely conventional but he just looks at them and waves his magic wand. He really can’t be bothered by their boundaries.
When Parker wanted to join a competitive dance troupe he spent hours in the dance studio so he could make the team. When he wanted to play the drums we bought him a used drum set. Sometimes the only way we could have a conversation was to go outdoors because his drumming would fill our small house, but it always felt worth it because he was doing what he loved and what he had set his mind to do.
In some ways, Parker really does have a magic formula for success. He has always use his magnificent smile to break down barriers. He was very young when he discovered that his off-beat sense of humor could fill a room with laughter and diffuse pretty much any situation. He encourages everyone he meets and is rarely acrimonious. Wherever Parker goes, joy, fun, and laughter follow. He is fiercely loyal to his friends and family, especially his siblings, and includes everyone who wants to enter into his world of grace, kindness, and felicity. Parker is loved wherever he goes.
For Parker, the world is full of possibility. He has little respect for the sense of entitlement so many of his peers carry. He doesn’t grumble and complain, he simply sets goals and works hard. Always with that generous smile, gregarious spirit, and genuinely funny sense of humor.
He’s 21 today. When he was younger I often sang, “You are my sunshine,” to him. I’d sing it to him now except, I guess that might be a little weird. But he is. He’s sunshine to me, to our home, to his workplace, to his classmates, to nearly everyone he meets. Parker has little time for the boundaries others try to put on his goals, passions, or talents. He thinks deeply about life, lives it fully, and brings it into every situation.
My world has been decidedly better in the 21 years Parker has been around. Our family’s lives have all been richer for what he brings. His friends and acquaintances and workmates and classmates have all been touched and changed for the better because of Parker's unquenchable spirit.
And it is really only beginning. Happy Birthday, Ray of Sunshine. So much of this world still awaits you. I can’t wait to see how your magic continues to change this world for the better!
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